I got a quick itch to spill some guts before heading to the venue for opening night of Oklahoma! where I'll be singing Curly McClain.
I heard some more cool news today that I'm excited to share with you all, but I'm not at liberty to say anything until I get ink on paper and what not. Knock on wood, ya know? But it got me thinking that I'm going to have this feeling of Opening night nonsense potentially for the rest of my life. Which is both cool and bothersome.
The day of opening, I usually like to have some shit to do during the day. Something that keeps my mind busy, otherwise I'm just putzing around singing way too much, warming up too much, thinking about "can I head to the venue yet?" It gets annoying. That's partly why I got started with my training business, keep me from spazzing out on performing.
When a show is really important to me, or if I'm a big figure head in the piece (the lead, like with Curly in Oklahoma!) or it's a big new company that I want to do really well for, then I'm not nervous necessarily, but I'm squirming, eager to get onto the stage and DO it.
I hate this feeling, because I wonder if the morning nonsense that I feel when singing will linger till the evening, I start to second guess shit I felt like a monster at just two days ago. Do I feel a tickle in my throat? I hope I don't cough on stage, I got to remember to pick up the pace on this line and slow it down on that - stay focused! Make sure to introduce that special color on the passaggio, you know the one. I pack my bag to take to the theater way too early, check it multiple times to see if I forgot anything. I don't stress eat anymore, but I'll usually eat all of my planned food for the day an hour before I even leave the house/apartment.
But then I'm on stage, and it feels perfect. I'm focused, in the moment. I'm not Kasey anymore I'm (Fill in Blank) and I'm not talking with my friends, but with people in this new world manifested onto this small space of magic. Maybe that's it, I spend so much time in the world of the character that the real world outside of the stage feels awkward, the skin doesn't feel like mine. I want to be at the theatre and wear THOSE clothes.
Making yourself feel comfortable on stage, making that floor space your home - suddenly everything else outside of it feels stupid - unnecessary, and you are just trying to figure out how to get back to your home. Just some thoughts.
Until next time,
Lift Big, Sing Big, and Look Great Doing It.
The Opera Bro